Sunday, November 28, 2010

Random thoughts

1. This the holiday season and for some reason GMC is running a commercial in which it is advertising its truck as a "nutcracker". I don't know about you but I would never buy a truck - or any vehicle - touted as a nutcracker.

2. I have 5 words that students must spell correctly or I dock them extra points. They are principal, yield, receive, guarantee and separate. Students tend to spell these as "principle", "yeild", "recieve" "garantee" and "seperate". After three exams there was only one hold out. Yet I got "municiple" and "loose" instead of "lose". I have given up on affect versus effect.

3. I mute all movie trailers on tv. Have you noticed that they are either all shooting guns (and this from the Hollywood left) or some woman screaming. It must be a shame being in a generation where the only talent required to be in a movie is the ability to scream.

4. Driving down the interstate to the family farm in Georgia I noticed two billboards. The first was for a uniform outlet store. Since the merchandise in outlet stores are irregulars I was wondering how could a uniform be irregular? The second was for a Bible outlet store. Now I know where all these weird interpretations of the Bible come from - its all those irregular Bibles!

5. Also while driving I noticed that all the hybrids are ugly and little cars as well as expensive. Why anyone would want to pay a premium for one is beyond me.

6. Speaking of stupid - I guess the "Smart" car is called that because why would anyone buy a car that stupid? Have you noticed that all the drivers appear to be white middle aged hippies? Even Car and Driver agree saying that the Smart is "slow, has disappointing mpg and cargo room, and isn't cheap. Seems like Dumb to us." Amen.

7. Why are the vehicles most often speeding minivans? Could it be that the owners are so ashamed to be driving them trying to prove something like "it may be a minivan but it can go really fast (in a straight line). Pity all those poor kids.

8. Isn't it ironic that Miller Lite's new commercials feature rather well endowed women giving wimpy men grief for now asking for Miller lite - which is a girlie beer? When "light" beer was introduced by Miller it was to get women, especially college coeds to drink beer by making it low calorie. To get men to drink it, the first commercials featured ex-jocks who argued whether it was less filling. Now Miller is trying to shame men into drinking it by saying in essence "if you are a wimp you might as well drink our girlie beer.

9. Speaking of commercials, I hate the ones that have children advertising adult products. That includes the one with the obnoxious brat in the investing commercials and the one with adults speaking like children. What is the point? How does this motivate grownups is beyond me.

10. Isn't it ironic that our institutions of higher learning have license plates that are functionally illiterate saying "Alumni University of (fill in the blank)"? I always ask the driver if he and his wife both graduated from the university and the answer is invariably no. The only schools that I know of that get it right are Spelman College (Atlanta) a women's school that says "Alumna" and Morehouse College (also Atlanta) that says "Alumnus".

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